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Because We Can: Superheros Who Need A Movie (Or A Reboot)


We all have one — a superhero we adore who we think Hollywood has given the short shrift.  Either their movies sucked ass, or they haven’t rated getting a movie at all.  Now, we’re not comic book types (sorry, fanboys), but we are aware of what’s up with pop culture in general.  Here’s Ellie’s list of superheros that either need a reboot kick in the pants, or even just a movie.  If you know of something already in development, let us know!

 

 

The Punisher.  Both Thomas Jane and Dolph Lundgren have played some version of the malevolent vigilante, and there was also some other guy whose name I don't remember.  None of the performances -- or scripts -- were any good.  This poor fellow needs his due.

The Punisher. Both Thomas Jane and Dolph Lundgren have played some version of the malevolent vigilante, and there was also some other guy whose name I don’t remember. None of the performances — or scripts — were any good. This poor fellow needs his due.

 

Never on the big screen.  Not a single female superhero who can carry her own film has been given the chance.  Wonder Woman is a weird superheroine, too; Hollywood just doesn't know what to do with her.  Get someone who understands her to get her a good treatment.

Never on the big screen. At least, not on her own. Wonder Woman is a weird superheroine, too, kind of like a female Thor, who aside from being in “The Avengers”, hasn’t fared as well at the box office as his fellow mightiest heros. She’s almost too powerful with a wacky backstory; Hollywood just doesn’t know what to do with her. Get someone who understands her to get her a good treatment.

 

Going after the evil that lurks in the heart of men is The Shadow's specialty.  His best known alias is Lamont Cranston, a pre-Batman wealthy playboy who disguises himself to fight crime.  His "superpower", so to speak, is the ability to cloud other people's mental faculties.  Low-tech, and would be a fantastic detective story.  At least, Ellie thinks so.

Going after the evil that lurks in the heart of men is The Shadow’s specialty. His best known alias is Lamont Cranston, a pre-Batman 1930s wealthy playboy who disguises himself to fight crime. His “superpower”, so to speak, is the ability to cloud other people’s mental faculties. Low-tech, and would be a fantastic detective story. Perhaps more so than a superhero story. And his film with Alec Baldwin was a horrible flop. Worth another look. At least, Ellie thinks so.

 

Ellie didn't actually mind the movie with Sean Connery, but some of the other casting sucked, and the script was weak.  At least, the ending of that one was left open to bring Alan Quartermaine back to life, perhaps even younger to facilitate a move to a different actor.  This varied cross-over has the ability to be so cool.  Find someone cool to breathe some fresh life into it.

Ellie didn’t actually mind the movie with Sean Connery, but some of the other casting sucked, and the script was weak. At least, the ending of that one was left open to bring Alan Quartermaine back to life, perhaps even younger to facilitate a move to a different actor. This varied cross-over has the ability to be so cool. Find someone cool to breathe some fresh life into it.

 

I don't know if Elektra has been relevant in cinema -- ever.  Barring the very blech film starring Jennifer Garner (I didn't like her in "Daredevil" either), Elektra has been at a standstill in film.  She has a great dynamic with Daredevil, and her ferocity and recklessness puts her at interesting odds with Daredevil, which would make for a better film than the one she got.  Again, the victim of a WTF script and limp acting.  Let her rage properly.

I don’t know if Elektra has been relevant in cinema — ever. Barring the very blech film starring Jennifer Garner (I didn’t like her in “Daredevil” either), Elektra has been at a standstill in film. She has a great dynamic with Daredevil, and her ferocity and recklessness puts her at interesting odds with him, which would make for a better film than the one she got. Again, the victim of a WTF script and limp acting. Let her rage properly.

 

Oh, Doctor Strange.  I don't know too much about him, except that he had a 1970s TV movie with a disco round, and shows up with The Avengers every once in a while.  His name was even dropped in "Captain America: The Winter Soldier".  He rules the mystical world, using dark forces to fight for good to balance the universe, no small feat.  Macabre, bizarre -- all of Ellie's favourites.  Give him a creepy, thrilling movie that is well-written and well-acted, and Ellie will be first in line at the theatre.

Oh, Doctor Strange. I don’t know too much about him, except that he had a 1970s TV movie with a disco round, and shows up with The Avengers every once in a while. His name was even dropped in “Captain America: The Winter Soldier”. He is part of the mystical world, using dark forces to fight for good to balance the universe, no small feat. Macabre, bizarre — all of Ellie’s favourites. Give him a creepy, thrilling movie that is well-written, with good cinematography and good casting, and Ellie will be first in line at the theatre.

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